Recently, a great many of my facebook friend have been complaining about the budget, reforms, congress, the judicial system, taxes, health care. The list goes on. To them I recommend some light reading: George R. R. Martin, A Song of Ice and Fire.
Many of you may wonder, “Sam, what does that book have to do with the problems of today?” To you non-believers in the land of Oz, I say three words:
TRIAL BY COMBAT
The modern political climate demands action, but begets sloth at every turn. People are unhappy with their political leaders; they are too lazy to go out and vote to get new ones (56% eligible voter turnout in 2008 presidential election, 37% in the 2010 midterm election). http://www.infoplease.com/ipa/A0781453.html. Pretty weak showing, not that I rocked the vote. Regardless of my irresponsibility to the choosing of our nation’s leaders, the solution is clear. We must start fighting for what we believe in. Not in the traditional sense of standing up for your rights, or non-violently attaining your needs. I am talking old old tradition of literally putting up your fists and fighting an opponent for a cause.
Martin displays this point in many cases throughout his book series. Spoiler alert for anyone living under a rock. In the first book and season of the series, a certain stature-impaired character stands accused by Catelyn Stark of attempting to kill her Son, Bran. The short man has done no such thing, but the injustice of the trial is made obvious to the reader. The dwarf demands a trial by combat; the right of anyone who stands accused of any crime.
A quick Breakdown: accused party and accuser each choose a champion, or fight for themselves. Arms and armor are donned. The two Champions fight to the death. If the accused side wins, charges are dropped.
The theory is that the gods intervene in a trial by combat and only the purest souls can survive the will of the gods. That, and years of training in swordplay to defeat an opponent.
I think we could easily apply this to modern trial and tribulation. Imagine a world where one could hire an MMA fighter to decide whether or not you are innocent or guilty. No longer do we hire people who are smarter than we are, we simply hire people who are stronger than we are. We could basically eradicate the entire system of laws and rules which is riddled with interpretation and loopholes. Although the new system has one GIANT loophole which is that the best fighter should win. And you still have payoffs, and thrown fights… etc. etc. I think that could be easily countered by taking say 5% of the money that is wasted on the prison and legislative system, and spending it on an elite enforcement group that kills people who cheat, and closely regulates registered fighter/defenders (RFs?) and their bank accounts, off-season jobs, etc.
These fights would not be to the death, though some people would probably still volunteer for such a job, and of course, defendants would always have the option of doing a regular trial of their peers, but the burden of proof ought lie on the defense so people are less quick to accuse.
Suing… should just be outlawed. Go beat your neighbor up, and then beat him up again in a trial by combat.
Legislation should all be decided by trial by combat. Our law makers can remain the same people, and normal voting can ensue for most issues. If congress fails to decide within a small allotment of days, let us say two days (every problem should be able to be solved in 48 hours max), each faction on a debate chooses a champion, paid for NOT by the taxpayers, but by the fund allocated for paying their champion (so ultimately, yes the taxpayers). The winning faction gets their way on whatever issue, be it gay marriage, abortions, budget… for a period of 8 years. Equal to a full Presidential term. This way if people like it, it can stay, if they do not like it, there is another fight!
It seems that congress does not seem to care about what the public thinks of their behavior, so we should just take their jobs away from them, and pay them way less, and let the issues decide themselves in the cage, on public television. CSPAN wouldn’t be so fucking boring if they had a cage match once in a while.
“Guerrerro v Ortiz, The Gay Marriage Debate. See it all decided tonight at 9PM on CSPAN. Brought to you by Bud Light.”
